If anyone ever reads this blog (which I find highly unlikely), they will read through the archives and figure how lame I actually turned out to be for the month of April. On March 31, I wrote a lengthy post about my procastination and the fact that blogging was going to play a role in relieving my quarter life crisis. After my claim on my own blog, that I was going to blog to get out of my rut followed by a month void of any activity, any reader would think wow--she really turned it around...
Despite my lack of follow-through in blogging, the month of April was actually quite a pivtoal month. While I am not trying to make excuses, I think that I am somewhat justified (oh wait, I just made an excuse) in ignoring my blog. Writing that first blog post was actually the first in a series of life-altering decisions. The most important of which is:
I quit my job.
And it was awesome.
So, how did I go from being marginally unstimulated to quitting my job? Here's how it happened:
My husband and I had several conversations over the past few weeks about my current work situation including my anxieties, frustrations and general disillusionment with my career. During these conversations, there was one word that kept creeping into the conversation: "helpless". I felt helpless that I had no control over my own job growth because I was stuck in a position that required me to do all of the dirty work. I felt helpless in actually realizing all of the promises that had been made to me. And I felt helpless because I felt that I couldn't make myself happy.
Now, if you know my husband, you know that helpless is not in his vocabulary. After I would mutter the word, my husband would quickly (and rightly so) challenge me on my so-called helplessness. Like most times when he is right, I quickly turn defensive and argue that he doesn't know what he is talking about.
Well, I finally hit a low point and realized that the spineless coward that I had become was not the person that I wanted to be. I wasn't going to be helpless and I had to take action to make my life better. No one else was going to do it for me. I decided to give an ultimatum: make it right or I am going to quit. Anyone who has ever considered giving putting themselves in that situation realizes that you have to be ready to walk away. We decided to look at the numbers and figured that I could bring in income for 6 months and we would be fairly comfortable. It wouldn't be fancy dinners and cocktails anymore but it was possible especially if we gave up certain luxuries. The result of that investigation was not only that I felt comfortable giving my "or else" speech, it made me realize that I actually did just want to quit but felt that I couldn't for financial reasons. Once I realized that I could take 6 months off and we would be OK, there was no turning back. I stayed up the rest of the night thinking about all of the great things that I could do and accomplish in that time period. The next day, I told my boss that I was leaving.
About a year ago, I read "The Four Hour Work Week" by Tim Ferriss and since then I have fantasized about becoming an entrepreneur. After reading that book, I felt strongly that I had the drive and the instincts to make it happen but what I didn't have was the guts to take the risk. It wasn't until I reread the book this spring that I realized that not only had I taken no action in achieving any of my goals, but that staying at my current job actually prevented me from every single goal that I have in life. My life goals did not include a mediocre career in Public Relations. My frustrations at my job and my sudden financial freedom created the perfect opportunity to put up or shut up. This is the moment that I have been waiting for and now I would have six months of free time. No excuses, no procrastinating.
So the month of April, I quit my job and have been focusing on transitioning out of the position.
This Thursday is my last day in the office and then I will be free to explore and work for my own ends. As I continue this journey, this blog will serve as the outlet of my accomplishments, setbacks and lessons learned. Who knows, maybe some aspiring entrepreneur will stumble across it and get inspired.
